I'm not talking about fangirls as in, say, teenage passionistas for Hannah Montana. I'm talking about women in my health club, the ones who show up for spin class (group stationary biking with loud music) oh-so-serious about it all. Usually they pile three towels on their bikes (do they even know the energy cost of washing a single towel?) and do the entire stretch set after class.
Why fangirls, you may ask?
You see, most bike spin classes let the instructor control the lights, the music and the fans.
The fans are designed to circulate the air in the room which can get pretty damn muggy, especially when the class is packed. The women are almost universally in favor of a "no-fan" policy. They come to class in their sleeveless tops and they simply hate the idea that the fan could chill them by blowing air across them. So when the instructor asks, "Fans?", they shout in union not to turn them on. This is not the exception, this is the rule.
Last week a miracle occurred. One of the regular instructors called in sick and a guest instructor (a woman) took the class. She put the fans on. The women began protesting loudly. "No fans! Turn them off!" It was getting ugly.
This instructor, astonishingly, said, "Sorry, the fans stay on in my classes. Ladies, if you're cold, please put on something to cover up to keep you warm. But I can't tell the guys to take off their clothes to cool down, and I'm not going to put somebody in danger of heat exhaustion when I've got a tool here to prevent it."
I nearly fainted from shock. The woman behind me stormed out of the class in protest. She really was furious. But, for me, the room was awesome that day. Not once did I fear that the paramedics would be called to haul my sweat-soaked body out of the place. It made for a great workout.
Of course, the guest instructor left, the fans are back to being turned on only a few times every class for only a few minutes and quickly turned off. The tyranny of the fangirls continues...

