For starters, there is no island in The Island. But there are certainly lots of other things going on. The Sixth Day, well, it could have used an island. On a very basic level, The Island sees the clones as the victims (like Blade Runner's replicants) where The Sixth Day actually succumbs to the evil clone gag -- which is really a variation on the time-honored "evil twin" plot.
Actors used to like to play those kinds of roles where they were twins (evil or otherwise) -- twice as much to love, you know? -- and now we're probably in for a run of clone movies where we'll be seeing even more of our favorite stars. Let's hear it for bio-tech.
It probably would have been a fairer fight comparing The Island with Logan's Run (1976) -- based on them each being about beautiful film stars on the lam in a future dystopia -- but that would have meant not having a crack at one of Arnold Schwarzenegger's last films, and what's the fun in that? So we settle for comparing a couple of recent takes on the genetics nightmare storyline. And Lucas's Attack of the Clones doesn't even get in the game there because I've already forgotten what that one was about.
I'm just not feeling like myself today, okay?
Let's start with this. If I had to choose between a world with two Arnold Schwarzeneggers or two Scarlett Johanssons, I would choose the latter. That probably sounds sexist but would you maybe buy it as a political statement? Okay, whatever. Still, The Island is a very easy film to watch. They hit me up for ten bucks to see The Island, and I feel like I got every penney's worth of entertainment for it. Quality acting all the way through, mind-blowing sets, and action sequences that are as big as it gets.
In the interest of full disclosure, I have to admit that I've seen the Michael Bay directed Armageddon something like five times and it always gets me. I love this film. I know there are people out there who like to look down on Bay because, I guess, he makes big movies that aren't serious enough for them, but I don't buy that. Bay is up to his old tricks in The Island and a lot of them he's got down pat. Things blow up, people escape impossible situations and their plans could use a little re-thinking. I didn't care.
Personally, I doubt that the cloning nightmare waiting around the corner for us is going to look like either The Island or The Sixth Day so we're only talking fun here. The Island is more fun to look at, more energetic and, even though it's got a bunch of hokum implanted in it, too, it feels more immediate and real. I really have to say -- having written a pilot about cloning and harvesting body parts for FOX back in 2000, I think -- that The Sixth Day made me want to tear my fists out of the ceiling. There wasn't a shred of scientific or political truth in it. I didn't buy the set-up, it was clumsily executed and Arnold currently has a lot more credibility and legitimacy up in Sacramento than he did playing the role he did in the movie. Plus, The Sixth Day feels so derivative of bad Arnold movies that came before.
I'm not saying The Island is perfect. It feels like two movies with different tones joined half-way through. There's some action that takes place only because it looks cool and no other reason. The sex scene misses the point of the clones being only 15-years-old mentally. But I'm being picky because -- despite a lot of lukewarm reviews the film has gotten -- I really, really liked it.
The Island. Because a cloned film by Michael Bay (as long as it's not Pearl Harbor) still works and after seeing the spectacle he's put together -- forget the sixth day -- you need a seventh one just to rest.
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Movies Squared (Two Reviews for the Price of One) is a companion blog to News Views & Schmooze.
To see more of these reviews based on comparing a film now out in the theaters with a similar one available to rent on DVD, please click here.
